Here’s what I’d like to do. I want to start a “Mean Mommies Club” where similarly minded “meanies” can get together to share strategies and support for depriving our children of all joy in the world. Jane can be our president.

BTW, she got phone calls from all sorts of folks not interested in the car, but impressed with her parenting. Oprah and Ellen are both bidding to get her on their shows.

HUMILIATION = Good parenting??  NO!  This women could have upheld the rules and been a good parent about it.  But when she makes national news by advertising her son’s mistake,this is humiliation.  Good parenting should up hold the rules and if she bought the car then she has the right to sell it, but none of that needs to involve advertising her son’s mistake.

That’s what I considered good parenting.
The kid was given a choice of either obeying the rules, or face some consequences that is already fore-mentioned.
It is his choice to make himself a laughing stock.

i agree with rebecca, the kid is gonna have major issues…this is not the first humiliating thing i bet that mother has done, what a shame… you can be a good parent and keep it private; if you have to go over board like that you arent being a good parent youre being a control freak. And mean mommies will eventually regret it when they are staring out the window of their retirement home wondering why nobody ever visits them…slowly dying alone

would people still call her the meanest mom if they found her son crashed into someone because of alcohol….and that second chance he “deserves” could have cost someones life

Eleven years ago,I had a similar situation with my son. It did not make nation headlines.I am not sorry I held to my parenting convictions. Children can be loved and taught responsiblility without the parent being a tryant.
Phyllis

I do not think the problem is that this women set out to make national news with this, I am not sure she did.  The problem is that good parenting and convictions are so rare these days that they make the national news.  Her real error was to answer the phone and drag her son on national TV.  This is the real problem with society today, that a shot at 15 minutes of fame is too appealing to most to pass up.

I do not think the problem is that this women set out to make national news with this, I am not sure she did.  The problem is that good parenting and convictions are so rare these days that they make the national news.  Her real error was to answer the phone and drag her son on national TV.  This is the real problem with society today, that a shot at 15 minutes of fame is too appealing to most to pass up.

What is interesting to me is that some of you would consider what she did as humilation?  Every day there in the news they talk about what so-in-so did to what-their-face. I applaud what this woman did for her son, she just taught him one of the most valuable lessons that a parent can teach their children -that there are consequences to their actions. Some are harsher than others. If a cop had pulled him over and arrested him and it had made the news would it still be considered “humilation”? or just because the mom did it? She is a hero in my book ~ my quess is that when her son grows into the man that she is raising him to be that he will visit her OR maybe even take care of her in her older years!

Bravo Jane!  He broke the rules and as Jennifer points out above - the consequences of alcohol in the car could have been much graver.  Kids, esp. teenagers, do need to know that some of their decision and actions have dire consequences - it’s a lesson they all need to learn.

i agree w/ jennifer—it’s one thing if the kid got a little parking ticket and was late paying it; having alcohol in a car is a big deal!

i think the lines in the Ad were apropriate; the kid had one simple rule and he blatantly broke it.  he needed a figurative slap in the face to be shown that the rule was there for an important reason.  i applaud Jane for dealing with it in such a decisive manner.

I only object to the idea that this mom is “mean”.  I know that this is often how we are seen when we hold the line.  I am much like this mom and am considered mean by some of my daughter’s friends.  Yet my daughter (16) often comments on how abandoned she feels her friends are by their parents.  These are parents who will allow all kinds of things to keep the illusion that their kids are their friends.  My own daughter and I have always been able to have a relationship built on mutual respect and generosity.  The lines I draw are always reasonable and drawn for both her benefit and for the benefit of the family.  Because she senses this, life has a way of making sense to her that is very comforting.  When I start to loosen up (get lazy), the effects show immediately in her acting out.  She hates it. 

As for humiliation, I do believe we have to be willing to embarrass our children when they are acting out in public.  I have taken my daughter out of a show with her friends all there.  Sometimes it is an opportunity to really make an impression when you have not been able to in any other way.  Embarrassing her has not been fun for me in any way.  It has been a strategic way to help her understand the consequences of her actions.  My emphasis is on “help”.  I don’t know about placing such an ad but drinking and driving is about the scariest thing for a parent.  How do you make an impression on your kid for something so so serious.  She also knows her son and all kids are different.  She may know that for him this is a good thing.  For another kid it may be counter-productive.

After telling my 3-year-old son that he could not jump on the couches he declared, “You’re mean, Mommy!”  To which I responded, “And cruel. Don’t forget cruel.  Mommy is mean AND cruel.”

well good parenting would be to definitely get rid off the car…but you dont have to embarrass the kid..good parenting takes him by the hand takes him to the police station to look at the reprocusions of drunk driving or taking him to some of those drunk driving classes…thats how a kid can picture the bad part of drinking and driving, and really learn a lesson…because folks, when a kid turns 18 they are out of your control freak jurisdiction…

I read about this story on the “real” mean mom’s website. My son is still young yet, but I hope to be a mean mom, too! Check out the mean mom’s website, there’s also a link to a story about a dad who hung his son’s truck in a tree!
http://www.askmeanmom.com

justino,
I think the kid will appreciate his mom did that when he gets older. It is still better than being found by a cop.
Maybe it is just a cultural difference.

Wow, I’m frankly appauled at the comments left here.  I realize that these actions were taken with good faith and in caring intent for her son, but to take it to that extreme?  Tell me, what are the chances that he’ll feel the same trust he did before?  I completely agree with the selling of the car 100% but to publicize it like she did is unexcusable.

I’m not sure I understand the thought process of the people who are calling this overreaction and humiliation.  This boy knew from the get go what the consequence was going to be if he had liquor in the car.  All she’s doing is following through with her threat.  So many parents don’t and then the public cry about kids that are out of control with no respect for the rules.  These same people blame the parents for that behaviour too.  I applaud her for having the guts to follow through and humour about the whole thing while she’s doing it.  If only all parents were like this the world would be a much better place.